Jesus was a stoner, uh-huh Born in Southern California, uh-huh Babylon on the corner, uh-huh Why they try the stoner, uh-huh I'm called the weed messiah Rock your lighter You transfixed with the spliff and your lips higher Like smoke rises Your sex is hightened Inhale, embrace Mary, but don't be frightened I bring the God flower Uplift the people Holy sacrament communion, take and let me feed you No superstitions and crucifixions or false prophets Crosses burning in my hand, call it burned object Smoke gathers like holy masses Take a hit, pass it to the left, it's in the passage You know my disciples This is a new revival Judas rosen to the soil two in which to cycle Smoking Mother Earth Blessing is the herb Mother Mary save us Thankful for what you gave us Roll it in my papers Share it with my neighbours High as scyscrapers A cult of cultivators We got the multitude Our sisters and our brothers How I break my bread Like it's the last supper I'm the blood of stoners I'm the higher after Believe me, elevate Hear the signs of laughter I'll be the greenest rapture Stoned Jesus with the cleanest shatter Some of demons has a dream depatcher Get the screen capture If you perceive this as a needless chatter You need to hit a Stoned Jesus chapter I'll be the greenest rapture Stoned Jesus with the cleanest shatter Some of demons has a dream inspector Get the screen capture If you perceive this as a needless chatter You need to hit a Stoned Jesus chapter Heavenly father, please forgive us again Heavenly father, please forgive us again

If I was Jesus I'd have some real long hair A robe and some sandals, is exactly what I'd wear I'd be the guy at the party Turning water into wine Me and my disciples We'd have a real good time Oooh and I'd lay my life down for you Yeah, and I'd show you who's the boss I'd forgive you and adore you While I was hangin' on your cross If I was Jesus I'd have some friends that were poor I'd run around with the wrong crowd Man I'd never be bored Then I'd heal me a blind man Get myself crucified By politicians and preachers Who got something to hide Oooh and I'd lay my life down for you Yeah, I'd show you who's the boss I'd forgive you and adore you While I was hangin' on your cross If I was Jesus Break If I was Jesus I'd come back from the dead And I'd walk on some water Just to mess with your head I know your dark little secrets I'd look you right in the face And tell you I love you With amazing grace Oooh and I'd lay my life down for you Yeah, I'd show you who's the boss I'd forgive you and adore you While I was hangin' on your cross If I was Jesus If I was Jesus

If Jesus was a rock star Livin' like a party every day and divin' off the stage If he'd give it to a pop star Then I'd, I'd wanna be just like him If Jesus was a rock star Throwin' daddy's money all around while he was gettin' down So they kicked him outta the bar Then I'd, I'd wanna be just like him Maybe all I really need is somethin' to believe Hell yeah (hell yeah) I need someone who can teach me to get on my knees Hell yeah (yeah) But if he looked like Kurt Cobain, I might If he drank the pain away, I might And if you think I can't be saved, that's right I really, really want you to know that If Jesus was a rock star Livin' like a party every day and divin' off the stage If he'd give it to a pop star Then I'd, I'd wanna be just like him If Jesus was a rock star (rock star) Throwin' daddy's money all around while he was gettin' down So they kicked him outta the bar (pop star) Then I'd, I'd wanna be just like him (yeah) I might meet him (where?) In the bathroom Hell yeah (hell yeah, uh) We might pop one (one) A red or blue Hell yeah But if he looked like Kurt Cobain, I might If he drank the pain away, I might And if you think I can't be saved, that's right I really, really want you to know that If Jesus was a rock star (rock star) Livin' like a party every day and divin' off the stage If he'd give it to a pop star (pop star) Then I'd, I'd wanna be just like him (woo) If Jesus was a rock star (rock star) Throwin' daddy's money all around while he was gettin' down So they kicked him outta the bar (pop star) Then I'd, I'd wanna be just like him (yeah) (A rock star) Just like him (A pop star)