Yodel-ay-ee-hoo (etc.) You're never too old to be young You're never too old to be young When you start to lose your figure And your hips are gettin' bigger Your chest may slip But don't you fret No matter how weak your knees may get You're never too old to be young You're never too old to be young Though your teeth are out And your whiskers sprout And your arches give away You're never too old to be young and gay (Yodel) When ya ain't got any fuzz upon your dome When ya ain't got any fuzz upon your dome Why the di*kens should you care If you ain't got any hair 'Cuz you never have to use a brush and comb When you know your legs are gonna give out soon When you know your legs are gonna give out soon When your joints begin to squeak If you practice for a week You can walk around and play yourself a tune Your voice may crack when you try to sing But you can't be good at everything (Yodel, etc.) You're never too old to be young You're never too old to be young

We've been down this room before How many times am I gonna have to close that door? When you've had wine, and you're lonely Why is that the only time you ever want me? You can call me an ex, when you hang out with friends You can call me on a Sunday, just to ask me how I've been You can call me almost any time, 'cept when you're under neon lights 'Cause you say you love me, and we know you don't mean it So just don't call me when you're drinking Just don't call me when you're drinking 'Cause I'll pick up and you'll Uber here We'll do what we always do, and you'll disappear Then I'll wake up, still holding on To something that I'll only have, 'til you're sober and you're gone You can call me an ex, when you hang out with friends You can call me on a Sunday, just to ask me how I've been You can call me almost any time, 'cept when you're under neon lights 'Cause you say you love me, and we know you don't mean it So just don't call me when you're drinking 'Cause I'll start thinking, that this time you really need me My heart won't learn the lesson, that you're always gonna leave me You can call me an ex when you hang out with friends You can call me on a Sunday, just to ask me how I've been You can call me almost any time, 'cept when you're under neon lights 'Cause you say you love me, and we know you don't mean it So just don't call me when you're drinking Just don't call me when you're drinking

I wish I was in Carrickfergus Only for nights in Ballygrand I would swim over the deepest ocean The deepest ocean, my love to find But the sea is wide and I cannot swim over And neither have I the wings to fly If I could find me a handsome boatman To ferry me over my love and I My childhood days bring back sweet reflections The happy times I spent so long ago My boyhood friends and kind relations Have all past on now like melting snow I'll spend my da - ys an endless rover Soft is the grass and sure, my bed is free Oh but to be back, in carrickfergus To strike that lonely road, down by the sea And in kilkenny it is reported On marble stone there as black as ink With gold and silver I would support her But I'll sing no more now til I get a drink For I'm drunk today and I'm seldom sober A handsome rover from town to town Ah but I'm sick now my days are numbered Come all ye young men and lay me down

I wish I was in Carrickfergus Only for nights in Ballygrand I would swim over the deepest ocean Only for nights in Ballygrand But the sea is wide and I cannot swim over And neither have I the wings to fly I wish I had a handsome boatman To ferry me over, my love and I My childhood days bring back sad reflections Of happy times I spent so long ago My boyhood friends and my own relations Have all past on now like melting snow I'll spend my days in this ceaseless roving Soft is the grass and my bed is free Oh but to be back now, in Carrickfergus On that long winding road, down to the sea Now in Kilkenny it is reported On marble stone there as black as ink With gold and silver I would support her But I'll sing no more now 'til I get a drink For I'm drunk today and I'm seldom sober A handsome rover from town to town Ah but I'm sick now my days are numbered Come all ye young men and lay me down Good evening Well, during the period 1939 to 1945 There was a very big war going on all over the world They called it World War II everywhere, except, of course, in Ireland Where we called it The Emergency Now, during this Emergency England had suffered a lot from air raids and all that stuff, so They sent for some of our fellas to go to England and Help to rebuild essential services Like houses and roads and bridges and Probably a few pubs While they were there, I suppose they helped To make England into a fit place for Irish people to live in And a lot of the lads who went over that time Found work with a man by the name of Mr. Robert McAlpine, as he was then called But in the meantime he did away with so many paddies That they saw fit to make a lord out of him And on his deathbed He didn't die in a building, he died in a bed And when he was dying in his bed, his last words were Or so they say, was If the men wish to honour my memory Let them keep two minutes' silence But keep the mixer going, and keep paddy behind it And this is about him and his little gang

I remember the night that he came in from the wintery cold and damp A giant of a man in an oilskin coat and the bundle that told he was a tramp He stood at the bar and he called a pint then turned and gazed at the fire On a night like this to be safe and dry is my one and only desire. So here's to those that are dead and gone The friends that I loved dear And here's to you then I'll bid you adieu Saying Donegal Danny's been here me boys Donegal Danny's been here Then in a voice that was hushed and low he said, listen I'll tell you a tale How a man of the sea became a man of the roads and never more will set sail I've fished out of Howth and Killybegs, Ardglass and Baltimore But the cruel sea has beaten me and I'll end my days on the shore So here's to those that are dead and gone The friends that I loved dear And here's to you then I'll bid you adieu Saying Donegal Danny's been here me boys Donegal Danny's been here One fateful night in the wind and the rain we set sail from Killybegs town There were five of us from sweet Donegal and one from County Down We were fishermen who worked the sea and never counted the cost But I never thought when that night was done that my fine friends would all be lost So here's to those that are dead and gone The friends that I loved dear And here's to you then I'll bid you adieu Saying Donegal Danny's been here me boys Donegal Danny's been here Then the storm it broke and drove the boat to the rocks about ten miles from shore As we fought the tide we hoped inside to see our homes once more Then we struck a rock and holed the bow and all of us knew that she'd go down So we jumped right into the icy sea and prayed to God we wouldn't drown But the raging sea was rising still as we struck out for the land And she fought with all her cruelty to claim that gallant band By St John's Point in the early dawn I dragged myself on the shore And I cursed the sea for what she'd done and vowed to sail her never more So here's to those that are dead and gone The friends that I loved dear And here's to you then I'll bid you adieu Saying Donegal Danny's been here me boys Donegal Danny's been here

Well if you got a wingo, Take her up to ringo, Where the waxies sing o all the day, If youve had your fill of porter, And you cant go any further, Give yer man the order "Back to the Quay" And take her up to Monto, Monto, Monto, Take her up to Monto, langeroo, to you. The Dirty Duke of Gloucester The dirty old imposter, Took his mot and lost her up the Furry Glen, He first put on his bowler, Then he buttoned up his trousers, And he whistled for a growler And he said "My man", Take me up to Monto, Monto, Monto, Take me up to Monto, langeroo, to you. You see the Dublin Fusiliers, The dirty old bamboozileers, They went to get the childer one, two, three, Marchin from the linenhall Theres one for every canonball, And Vickis going to send yis all oer the sea, But first go up to Monto, Monto, Monto, First go up to Monto, langeroo, to you. When the Tzar of Russia And the King of Prussia, Landed in the Phoenix Park in a big balloon, They asked the Police band to play The Wearing of the Green, But the buggers in the Depot Didnt know that tune, So they both went up to Monto, Monto, Mont, They both went up to Monto, langeroo, to you. The Queen she came to call on us, She wanted to see all of us, Im glad she didnt fall on us, Shes eighteen stone, Mr. me Lord Mayor, sez she, Is this all youve got to show to me? Why no, maam, there is more to see, Pg mo thin, And he took her up to Monto, Monto, Monto, He took her up to Monto, langeroo, Goodnight to you

Schooldays over, come on then John, time to be gettin' your pit boots on On with your sark and moleskin trousers, it's time you were on your way Time you were learning the pitman's job and earning a pitman's pay Come on then Jim, it's time to go, time you were working down below Time to be handling a pick and shovel, you start at the pit today Time you were learning the collier's job and earning a collier's pay Come on then Dai, it's almost light, time you were off to the anthracite The morning mist in on the valley, it's time you were on your way Time you were learning the miner's job and earning a miner's pay Schooldays over, come on then John, time to be gettin' your pit boots on On with your sark and moleskin trousers, it's time you were on your way Time you were learning the pitman's job and earning a pitman's pay