Wearing Me Out - Karla Davis

From morning to night, I stayed out of sight Didn't recognize I'd become No more than alive, I'd barely survive In a word, overrun Won't hear a sound (he's curled into the corner) From my mouth (but still the screen is flickering) I've spent too long (with an endless stream of garbage) On the inside out (curse the place) My skin is cold (in a sea of random images) To the human touch (the self-destructing animal) This bleeding heart's (waiting for the waves) Not beating much (to break) I murmured a vow of silence, and now I don't even hear when I think aloud Extinguished by light, I turn on the night Wear its darkness with an empty smile I'm creeping back to life My nervous system all awry I'm wearing the inside out Look at him now, he's paler somehow But he's coming around He's starting to choke, it's been so long since he spoke Well, he can have the words right from my mouth And with these words, I can see Clear through the clouds that covered me Just give it time, then speak my name Now we can hear ourselves again I'm holding out (he's standing on the threshold) For the day (caught in fiery anger) When all the clouds (and hurled into the furnace) Have blown away (he'll curse the place) I'm with you now (he's torn in all directions) Can speak your name (and still the screen is flickering) Now we can hear (waiting for the flames) Ourselves again (to break)

This that lo-fi, $uicide Dreams of when I die Blood red tears when I cry Manic depression in my eyes Player from the 80's Crack cocaine done raised Lucifer done saved me Satan's son in a Mercedes $uicide for life Until I rot and decay I'm hearing "kill them all" With every word that I say This my inauguration day to come up out of my grave Resurected by the demon, Antoine De Mone' But, let's get deeper Got some bitches and a beeper Soul seeker, I'm the fucking devil's Aaron Neville I got a soul to sell but it's settled Last week I sold my soul for a fucking bezel Crucify me... Crucify me wearing Tommy All black with the goons behind me Lurking, searching for that blood to spill Pop them pills and sip that barre Gut that blunt and light that gar, I'm smoking till the death Pop them bars and fuck that broad, I'm searching for what's next Put me in a fucking Polo bodybag Don't be jealous everybody wanting what Oddy have Shotty blast Put that Tommy back and grab the Gucci Uzi spraying through me No my life ain't like no mother fucking movie Yeah, it's more like a confession tape Tape her confession, take off her dress and watch her fucking faint Pretty girl sacrifice Ugly hoe in the back on ice Lit a match cause the gas was asking twice Slash and slice I'm passing lice Snatching ice and casting dice Luck of the draw Stuffing with straw until I choke and I clog Yeah I'm cuffing myself bitch to Lucifer's claw Suit and a saw Killing yourself is just business Please don't take it personal In my hell it's snowing, bitch I'm watching winter fall Crucify me wearing Tommy All black with the goons behind me Lurking, searching for that blood to spill Pop them pills and sip that barre Gut that blunt and light that gar, I'm smoking till the death Pop them bars and fuck that broad, I'm searching for what's next Crucify me wearing Tommy All black with the goons behind me Lurking, searching for that blood to spill Pop them pills and sip that barre Gut that blunt and light that gar, I'm smoking till the death Pop them bars and fuck that broad, I'm searching for what's next

Spare me Our fabled tragedy Thinking That I could change your mind You've got me lost inside this headspace I'm stuck in the clouds and I'm not coming down I have to stop myself from staring When I get lost in your eyes but you feel nothing in mine Just one time I wish that I could replace The one that's holding my place beside you This line was reserved for your name But I've lost faith in the way I've loved you (The way I've loved you) Sparе me our fabled tragedy I laid it all on thе line and wasted so much time Thinking that I could change your mind I opened up my heart for you to break me It's wearing thin And I'd give anything to let go of this pain Erase what's been Tell me why I can't forget you I can't hold onto hope that our paths will collide (Our paths will collide) Here I'll stand, heart in hand without a pulse to stay alive Stay alive What hurts the most is how truly scared I was of you And all the time I spent overthinking Drowning inside my own sick and twisted mind Peace in you is something that I can't find I think it's time for me to let go I'll miss you more than you could ever know I'm sorry for the things I've never said You're the best friend that I ever had Spare me our fabled tragedy I laid it all on the line and wasted so much time Thinking that I could change your mind I opened up my heart for you to break me It's wearing thin And I'd give anything to let go of this pain Erase what's been Tell me why I can't forget you (It's wearing thin) (Erase what's been)

We've all seen enough wrong and right To know everything's not black and white There's always something in between No matter how long or well you live You don't get anything you don't give Still no slate is clean For better or worse, anybody can Take a look around and find a better man Upright no matter how he's faring No matter what kind of shoes he's wearing The shoes he's wearing They don't make the man So many people out running around Handicapped before they hit the ground Thinking there's nowhere to go Shouldn't we all be looking for ways To keep on seeing our better days We're not chained to what we know But if your eyes are open and your mind is free There's no tellin' what a man can be Upright no matter how you're faring No matter what kind of shoes you're wearing The shoes you're wearing They don't make the man But if you can't walk through the best of times And the worst of times Find your feet still walking the line You'll never carry the load worth bearing No matter what kind of shoes you're wearing The shoes you're wearing They won't make the man The shoes you're wearing They won't make the man

That's when I reach for my dissolver That's when I feel dystopia That's when I reach for my resolver That's when I think I get the joke Beat my head against the wall and I pray for a crack But nobody told me that the wall hits back Mother pariah come and rescue me Somebody tell me how it ought to be A big star, Hollywood I'll be the tower of ivory It's made of human teeth But that just doesn't bother me That's when I reach for my dissolver That's when I feel dystopia That's when I reach for my resolver That's when I think I get the joke I would swallow any stone it takes to trade the day away What route to choose just to delude Vacation homes and tanqueray The pedigree of piety, but mister if you disagree How will you miss your two front teeth Tonight I'm wearing silk Spray on tan Silk on hand Sam I am Have I been here before? Spray on tan Silk on hand Sam I am I'm wearing silk That's when I reach for my dissolver That's when I feel dystopia That's when I reach for my resolver That's when I think I get the joke

Just another victim of the... victim of the ghetto Just Another victim, that's how it goes, ooh Heavy foot traffic jam the hallway all day Adolescence working for small pay World so little he could never leave his block His home bullet riddled so he always need his Glock He coast with his eye open, keep his metal smoking Young wasted minds fiending on dimes, coking Forgot kids quick to break rules and known to make fools Out of many, down the streets we more safe than school There's no diploma that can break you from the coma Of a bloody war in the country, the youth hungry On the corner hyenas amongst me Yapping about the stories they be hearing, always swearing Can't even spell the shit that he be wearing Caught up in the silk web of material Superficial stains ya brain tissue, that's the issue The young is lost at their own cost, dreaming Screaming how we never hold positions, that's the meaning Mothers of murder victims share the same grief The elderly shake their head in disbelief And no relief came till I aimed And blast one shot and left my name... the GZA Just another victim of the... victim of the ghetto Just Another victim, that's how it goes, ooh My residence is a city where army veterans smoke rocks On torn down blocks, drug spots set up their shops And cops watch innocent niggas roaming flocks Romanism in tops, papers and knots Churches and liquor stores on every corner plot To get money knots some funny niggas act like They could pop Glocks and those who can't cop Sisters giving up ass a lot, brothers giving up cash a lot Babies struggling to become someone because their parent's not Just another victim of the ghetto, where lost minds settle When the devils uncivil society and die free With double 'W' followed by J-D around the necks and wrists The God is now a dog, the Earth is called a bitch And all my people wish to get rich in this wilderness to push a Lexus Ice on everything from rings and bracelets to the necklaces Children molested within these pest infested buildings Seeds uneducated in these schools, paint on the ceilings Is peeling off, but all I see is lost black babies calling "Please somebody save me, please somebody save me" Just another victim of the... victim of the ghetto Just Another victim, that's how it goes, ooh Just another victim of the... victim of the ghetto Just Another victim, that's how it goes, ooh Just another... just another... victim of the ghetto

Waves crashing on her feet Standing in some rolled up jeans Making tracks in the sand It's like she's living in a photograph But disappearing silouhette Flip flop in her hands And every kiss is burnt and hot I can't let them go to waste Let's say the night is all that we've got And I'm ready for the chase We can be sun downers, edge of towners Waiting on a spark Silent sounders, come unwounders Tangled in the dark Like the moon is hanging lets keep this dream awake Let's go out into the AM But tonight let's be some sun downers (sun downers) Blue gives into the black Red lips just like a match That sets me on fire While the whole falls asleep Every look that you're giving me Is taking me higher And every kiss is burnt and hot I can't let them go to waste And once we start, we can't stop Like 80 with no brakes We can be sun downers, edge of towners Waiting on a spark Silent sounders, come unwounders Tangled in the dark Like the moon is hanging, lets keep this dream awake Let's go out into the AM But tonight let's be some sun downers (sun downers) We can be the only two up When they close down this town Lets just live it up til it comes back around We can be sundowners We can be come unwounders Sundowners, edge of towners Waiting on a spark Silent sounders, come unwounders Tangled in the dark Like the moon is hanging, lets keep this dream awake Let's go out until the AM But tonight let's be some sundowners Let's just be some come unwounders We can be some play it louders Gotta start sundowners (Yeah) Sundowners Sundowners Let's just be some sundowners

I'm a bad man James Dean, kinda Steve McQueen Straight out the bad lanes I rolled in and rained down Like a storm cloud or a heat wave Made you stay undercover where it's safe Don't give a damn about the plans you made We're staying in the bed all day Cause I'm selfish Restless like a river, can't help it I'm taking what you give me but I still want more I still want more Cause I'm selfish Yeah I'm selfish, I'm selfish for you Have you seen yourself in a full-length mirror Spinning around lately I'd lie, cheat, and steal Feel the sweet scent overtake me But the Lord sent an angel to save me So he can't blame me When my hands get a mind of their own Girl, if they get ahold of you, I ain't never letting go Cause I'm selfish Restless like a river, can't help it I'm taking what you give me but I still want more I still want more Cause I'm selfish Yeah I'm selfish, I'm selfish for you Oh, so selfish for you I still want more I still want more I still want more I still want more Cause I'm selfish Restless like a river, can't help it I'm taking what you give me but I still want more I still want more Cause I'm selfish Yeah I'm selfish, I'm selfish for you Still want more I still want more I still want more I still want more I'm selfish for you