Trying Not To (feat. Roman Alexander) - Alana Springsteen

Can you hear all of my open wounds? I'm whispering as loud as the flowers bloom I've been somewhere in the sky, don't worry I'll be right on time if I can help it I'm so sorry I've been trying not to cry in the grocery store Little bully inside pinning me to the floor It must be easier than it seems But I can't get these thorns out of my teeth It's killing me, but I want more Cover my ears I think I'm shutting down, going standby Sleep mode, offline Feel nothing It's quiet as hell in my room I've been fighting for my sanctuary How do I stay alive if I don't wanna be? I've been trying not to cry in the grocery store Littlе bully inside pinning me to the floor It must bе easier than it seems But I can't get these thorns out of my teeth It's killing me, but I want more

You said it's over now Not tomorrow, not the next day, not any day You said you'd figured out what can move me Darling, I figured that out too Make no time for tylenol, salbutamol Fuck my life, you cared when I was sick No one ever gave a shit You said you gave the world, I took it all You fought this war, once I had asked me "What am I doing this for?" It should've been you Well, now it's you Never been the one for romance Never thought that I'd get married Never been the kind to give a shared life a second glance Selfish prosе, a lifestyle of a stained glass window Wondеr what colours and shapes I'll throw I look to the horizon And all I ever saw was a background for my phone It should've been you The constant and the undiscovered you Well, now it's you What a perfect time for realization I'll wake up early I'll watch the sunrise I never liked the rain but sunshine Hasn't worked its charms of late Call my mother, tell her I love her You know I never had the guts to say "I'll dream of summer, I'll dream of you and me" "In that Coyote, lying out in the shade" Just tell me one thing When your heart finds its place, just take a step back and smile When you're sat in a better place We could've kicked my ass together We could've slapped my face together We could've stitched my mind together If only I knew what to say We could've kicked my ass together We could've slapped my face together We could've stitched my mind together So this is how I lose you

My God, what does it mean When I call To talk And I fall apart If you won't pick up your phone Guess I can't Admit I'm in Over my head That I'm falling down that slippery slope and climbing back into your bed Please baby Let me go on living in the eye of the storm Please baby Let me go on thinking that I'm in control When I'm When I'm trying not to love you When I'm trying not to love you When I'm trying not to love you When I'm trying not to love you When he leans I lean Hanging on his candor Just another fan girl If he goes I follow, 'cause Maybe if I'm with him I won't get to thinking Please baby Let me go on living in the eye of the storm Please baby Let me go on thinking that I'm in control When I'm When I'm trying not to love you When I'm trying not to love you When I'm trying not to love you When I'm trying not to love you When he leans I lean Hanging on his candor Just another fan girl If he goes I follow, 'cause Maybe if I'm with him I won't get to thinking It gets harder and harder and harder to ignore The bad things When you keep on you keep on you keep on giving me things that ain't good It gets harder and harder and harder 'cause I'm starting to see What you're keeping from me And still I'm begging for more and more baby When I'm trying not to love you (When I'm trying not to love you) When I'm trying not to love you When I'm trying not to love you When I'm trying not to love you When I'm trying not to love you (When he leans) (I lean) When I'm trying not to love you (Hanging on his candor) (Just another fan girl) When I'm trying not to love you (If he goes) (I follow, 'cause) When I'm trying not to love you (Maybe if I'm with him) (I won't get to thinking) When I'm trying not to love you (Trying not to love you) (Trying not to love you) When I'm trying not to love you (Trying not to love you) (Trying not to love) When I'm trying not to love you (Trying not to love you) (Trying not to love) When I'm trying not to love you (Trying not to love you) When I'm trying not to love you

I'm not tryin' to forget you anymore I've got back into remembering all the love we had before And I'd been tryin' to forget someone that my heart still adores So I'm not tryin' to forget you anymore You're just someone who brought happiness into my life And it did not last forever, oh, but that's all right We were always more than lovers and I'm still your friend And if I had the chance, I'd do it all again So I'm not tryin' to forget you anymore I've got back into remembering all the love we had before And I'd been tryin' to forget someone that my heart still adores So I'm not tryin' to forget you anymore You're just someone who brought happiness into my life And it did not last forever, oh, but that's all right We were always more than lovers and I'm still your friend And if I had the chance, I'd do it all again So I'm not tryin' to forget you anymore I've got back into remembering all the love we had before And the best thing of my life is still When you walked through my door So I'm not tryin' to forget you anymore I'm not tryin' to forget you anymore