If teardrops were diamonds And only mine were used They could pave every highway Coast to coast And not be close to through If teardrops were diamonds Cold blue If heartaches were rubies Stacked up just like stones There would be a mountain Ten miles high Built by mine alone If heartaches were rubies Mine alone You might begin to understand The price that love has to pay For being wrong Solo If sad thoughts were emeralds And with not counting In between Just half the ones I've had today Could turn The whole world green If sad thoughts were emeralds And the world turned green You might just Get the message that There's more to loneliness Than can be seen If teardrops were diamonds And only mine were used...

If teardrops were pennies and heartaches were gold I'd have all the riches my pockets would hold I'd be, oh, so wealthy with treasures untold If teardrops were pennies and heartaches were gold An acre of diamonds I'd offer to you A solid gold mansion, an airplane or two This whole world would be yours to have and to hold If teardrops were pennies and heartaches were gold If teardrops were pennies and heartaches were gold I'd have all the riches my pockets would hold I'd be, oh, so wealthy with treasures untold If teardrops were pennies and heartaches were gold Solo The tears that have fallen won't buy you a thing The heartaches you've caused me won't pay for a ring The love that I wanted would not have grown cold If teardrops were pennies and heartaches were gold If teardrops were pennies and heartaches were gold I'd have all the riches my pockets would hold I'd be, oh, so wealthy with treasures untold If teardrops were pennies and heartaches were gold But teardrops aren't pennies And heartaches aren't gold

An acre of diamonds I'd offer to you A solid gold mansion, an airplane or two This whole world would be yours to have and to hold If teardrops were pennies and heartaches were gold If teardrops were pennies and heartaches were gold I'd have all the riches my pockets would hold I'd be, oh, so wealthy with treasures untold If teardrops were pennies and heartaches were gold The tears that have fallen won't buy you a thing The heartaches you've caused me won't pay for a ring The love that I wanted would not have grown cold If teardrops were pennies and heartaches were gold If teardrops were pennies and heartaches were gold I'd have all the riches my pockets would hold I'd be, oh, so wealthy with treasures untold If teardrops were pennies and heartaches were gold But teardrops aren't pennies And heartaches aren't gold

Well, I ain't afraid of dying, it's the thought of being dead I wanna go on being me once my eulogy's been read Don't spread my ashes out to sea, don't lay me down to rest You can put my mind at ease if you fill my last request Prop me up beside the jukebox if I die Lord, I wanna go to Heaven, but I don't wanna go tonight Fill my boots up with sand, put a stiff drink in my hand Prop me up beside the jukebox if I die Just let my headstone be a neon sign Just let it burn in memory of all of my good times Fix me up with a mannequin, just remember I like blondes I'll be the life of the party even when I'm dead and gone So prop me up beside the jukebox if I die Lord, I wanna go to Heaven, but I don't wanna go tonight Fill my boots up with sand, put a stiff drink in my hand Prop me up beside the jukebox if I die Just make your next selection And while your still in line You can pay your last respects One quarter at a time So prop me up beside the jukebox if I die Lord, I wanna go to Heaven, but I don't wanna go tonight Fill my boots up with sand, put a stiff drink in my hand Prop me up beside the jukebox if I die Prop me up beside the jukebox if I die Lord, I wanna go to Heaven, but I don't wanna go tonight Fill my boots up with sand, put a stiff drink in my hand And prop me up beside the jukebox if I die Oh, prop me up beside the jukebox if I die Joe!