I Don't Know How to Love Him - Cynthia Erivo

I don't know how to love him What to do, how to move him I've been changed, yes really changed In these past few days, when I've seen myself I seem like someone else I don't know how to take this I don't see why he moves me He's a man He's just a man And I've had so many men before In very many ways He's just one more Should I bring him down? Should I scream and shout? Should I speak of love Let my feelings out? I never thought I'd come to this What's it all about? Don't you think it's rather funny I should be in this position I'm the one who's always been So calm, so cool, no lover's fool Running every show He scares me so I never thought I'd come to this What's it all about? Yet, if he said he loved me I'd be lost, I'd be frightened I couldn't cope, just couldn't cope I'd turn my head, I'd back away I wouldn't want to know He scares me so I want him so I love him so

Killin' me slowly, I swore an oath to never break that hope That we could be together, that whoever I could love, I could see as forever You broke my heart, know it's kinda complicated And it ain't your fault, our love wasn't worth lasting But you took all the passion But it feels like a part of me Is a little harder on what my body likes to perceive Everything we promised, you started smoking weed I started hitting these dranks, so maybe you'd realize that it ain't the same But now it ain't about you, and it ain't about us It's just about me, and everything I just have to admit to the world, one thing I don't know how to love anymore I don't know how to love anymore I've never felt so confused, staring in the mirror With the blissfulness glooms Stare into someone's eyes I don't feel that spark Lust, just fuels a rampage in my mind Telling me I should not give a fuck Stuck in wanderlust, he always a better man, and I'm the runner up See me at my weakest, drinking every week and What are we trying to prove? I'm just trying to play it cool But not for the same reasons I ain't looking to you for love I am just looking at you to fuck If I am being honest I don't know how to love, anymore I don't know how to love, anymore To good mornings and to goodnights Every time you drove home from my place I had to pray you were alright We went shopping for clothes, you took me to your parents' house Even talked about one day you playing my spouse I told you my fears, and all my stories You always listened and never said I was boring With you I was on a high always soaring I saw you everyday My favorite moments were ordering you coffee bean Thought I scored well in this love lottery We were building something up no pottery I spent all my time Wasted all my love And you never gave it back And that's okay, but you shattered everything I don't want it to go down the same way I don't feel emotions for anyone like I did before Yet you managed to break my heart Now let me restart Let me find my way Through these trenches I'm on the side court and I'm sitting on these benches Just a wreck and Trying to fix this mess and I don't know where I'm going anymore If I'm being honest with you I wanna love the same But I really don't know how to love anymore, anymore, anymoew I don't know what say, I don't know what to do I've just been going through struggles If this is what love puts you through Maybe I don't wanna love anymore Maybe I don't wanna love anymore Anymore, anymore, anymore, anymore, anymore, anymore I don't really wanna love you anymore I don't love you anymore I don't know how to love anymore I don't know how to love anymore

Sarah's an honest person She wouldn't ask you for a thing Sarah, she's always searching Looking for who she is Together feels so far away That's what they're all saying Forever it goes on and on Feels like she won't make it Sweet Sarah has been home so long she's lost the will to move I can't blame her, as the music plays I can only feel the gloom Oh, I only feel the gloom Picture of all that's perfect Sarah was made for stars at night She gave the world warmth and laughter Bright as the moon that hugs the night It seems she's hiding Eclipse that stole the light She needs reminding Of what's behind her eyes Sweet Sarah has been home so long she's lost the will to move I can't blame her, as the music plays I can only feel the gloom Oh, I only feel the gloom If only she knew she carried the sun inside her hands Like drops of pure heaven, they slip through her fingers to the sand What I wouldn't give to be the vessel I'd catch them before they land I'd give them back to her, 'cause I understand Sweet Sarah has been home so long she's lost the will to move I can't blame her, as the music plays I can only feel the gloom Oh, I only feel the gloom Sweet Sarah Sweet Sarah Sweet Sarah Mmm

Is that me? Who's floating away Lifted up to the clouds By a kiss Never felt nothing like this Is that me? I don't recognize Love's the one thing I knew All about I had it all figured out But what about trust? What about trust? What about tenderness? Tenderness... What about tears when I'm happy What about wings when I fall I want you to be A story for me That I can believe in Forever So what about What about? Love Will you be my light in the storm Will I see a new world? In your eyes With you my whole spirit rides And what about hope? What about hope? What about joy? What about joy What about tears when I'm happy What about wings when I fall I want you to be A story for me That I can believe in Forver And what about What about? What about? What about Love? What about? What about? What about? What about? What about love? You and me, you and me, seem to be What about What about Love?