Help Wanted - Buddy Guy

Help wanted Do you want to pay the bills? Help wanted Have unnecessary skills? If a house is barely haunted, do you think it's really real Fill out an application, just be patient, you know the drill As a veteran, I was settling into a life of self-pity Living with my mother in my favorite city She started getting on my case about wasting my life I missed the action of the Air Force and the feeling of flight "Get a job", she demanded, so I picked up the papers Saw an ad that wasn't bad; at least I wasn't a waiter I was trained in computers, I was fit and athletic I was tired of being a loser and feeling pathetic So I went and interviewed; I was a dude without options The more questions she asked, the more my mind flashed caution Do you believe in UFOs? Yeah, I've had my fair share Clairvoyance, ESP, do you believe in what isn't there? And (later in the lockers[?]), I was honestly scared But I was desperate and upset with just chilling in chairs So I said, "The pay is steady, then I'm willing and able" She said, "You're hired." I was wired, I was suddenly stable Help wanted Do you want to pay the bills? Help wanted Have unnecessary skills? If a house is barely haunted, do you think it's really real Fill out an application, just be patient, you know the drill I met the dudes in my crew, they were slimy and stinky Took my down in the basement, showed me a really big twinkie I started thinking the back of the bible was entirely right I started seeing crazy shit that will turn you white The dead rising from the grave, this is totally the end of days At least I was getting paid, in spite of my mental state Better than telling fortunes in Coney Island with a cape Better than birthday parties where I wasn't offered any cake I [?] patience perfect, I'm determined and devoted Found a God in a painting and a spectral locomotive Sometimes [?] sometimes I can not handle But I'm about to [?] settles God is watching over me; protecting me from dangers Sometimes it's up to me to bust a beast with binding lasers I have tools, I have talent, it's a challenge when you're chosen But I was born to bust a ghost, [?] who oppose us Help wanted Do you want to pay the bills? Help wanted Have unnecessary skills? If a house is barely haunted, do you think it's really real Fill out an application, just be patient, you know the drill

* Please e-mail the latter about any missing/misspelled graf writers [Bigg jus] Yo word the fuck up this is for. (dj mr. len) The motherfuckin (el-p) undisputed (stylemaster) Coflow (phase 2) bigg jus (yo check it) The elevated trainline of the day linin the a Where I first encountered the likes of baby168 Stan, iz the wiz, k56, t.k.a. Kingpin throwups and way back then was abe Who watched us all rippin all loud up on the inside no e As I progressed to the 7 yard, early johnny d Caine, officer147, c.r.a. Fuzz, comet, blade, ajax and angelduster Cuttin school with roman, hittin my first uni-wide Ridin the l, overlookin the handball courts A giant top to bottom flame, demo tba Ghost tmr, easel cuk Switchin gears, lay the one towards the end Who could forget the master of destruction Led by quik, stash and min Destroyin all lines of thought, the vamp squad were bugged I was a young kid, watchin these writers styles that bugged Fab 5 freddy,? models, then slug I was a young kid, watchin these writers styles that bugged We cheer? kay park, dirty slug I keep it movin like flint 707 I'm out to bomb ban 2,? Rip 170,?, f.b.i. Hi darth bramble, 147 shy Rockin whole cars, you ain't seven kevin krash Just to name a few style elements from my past then While my crew tend to see technology in it's grasp From all city built upon the foundation of true masters Therefore when a architect delete old b-boyism I'm mackin And why indelible continue kid to advance material that's classic Fundameric bus y'all to the uptown 1 2's and 3's From the queens parts to layups to the brooklyn i-n-d's I keep on like t-kid, lionel west a to s-e Top cat, rockin up tall letters from philly To the transit cop, curly, ferrari, hicky and ski Lady pink, lady heart, add the essence? Searchin for the hidden message, hit up me aersol alphabetics Subvert word brutalizer Critical thinkin modifier Bigg jus, lune tns, stark black tunnels a live wire Soaked in burgundy, float master? I'll make the tails red devil Rust on flat black, you ain't with krylon j-3 Mixed with amazon green, hit the ghostyards Like tnt skeme, the ex-vandal Nicer t-a-t, ebony dudes Family163, v-f-r sharp delta chrome ? 3yb Superkool123, k-161 Jive156, 'cause nfc Stay high 149 Mitch 77, l-t-n-s Vade, hondo u-g-a Original freight hater ribone, ab 63 Cope two, still showin versatility Peace to don p and 168 tracy I was a young kid, watchin these writers styles that bugged Fab 5 freddy,? models, then slug I was a young kid, watchin these writers styles that bugged We cheer? kay park, dirty slug Straight up, for niggaz who don't understand Obviously this wasn't made for you, so fuck you Bigg jus, lune tns and we out

Louis: It seems today, that all you see is violence in movies, and sex on T. V. Peter: But where are those good old-fashioned values, on which we used to rely? Brian: It used to be, a big time star was elegant as Garbo, or Hedy Lamarr. Stewie: But now we get whores like Jenny Lopez, you want to curl up and die. Lucky theres a Family Guy. Lucky theres a man who positively can do all the things that make us- Stewie: Laugh and cry! Hes a Family Guy! Louis: When I was young, the songs were fair, with Mister Johnny Mathis, and Sonny and Cher. Peter: But now we get Justin Timber-homo. Louis: A heartache all gone awry! Brian: The classic films were works of arts, the images were graceful, the stories were smart. Stewie: But now we get Matrix Revolution, Im sorry I know this doesnt rhyme, but what the hell were you Wachowski Brothers thinking?! Lucky theres a family guy, lucky theres a fella, sweeter than vanilla, wholesome as a piece of- Stewie: Apple Pie! Hes a family guy! Lois: His smiles a simple delight. Chris: He lets me see the boobies on the internet sites. Lois: Peter! Meg: He bought me my cute little hat. Brian: Yeah we should have a talk about that. About that! And his hat! Brian: Hes mastered the comedy arts. Stewie: He says, Look out, Hiroshima! Then casually farts. (fart sound effect) Lois: Hes loaded with sexy appeal. Peter: And best of all my titties are real. Have a feel! Brian: No thank you. Stewie: I gave it the office. Lois: The Brady Bunch has got their Mike and pretty Laura Petrie has Dicky Van Dyke. But who around here could fill those loafers? But heres a happy reply. Lucky theres a family guy. Lucky theres a man who positively can do all the thing that make us- Stewie: Laugh and Cry! Hes a Family Guy! Hes a Family Guy!!! Lois: Oh My! Thank you very much! What a welcome. Peter: I am gunna buy each and every one of you a beer after the show. Whoa, whoa, whoa! Im kidding for Christs sake, Im not serious. Thats expensive! Look, just the fact that I came up with the idea should tell you Im generous; I shouldnt actually have to spend any money. Meg: Uh, can we turn the spotlight down a bit? Brian: Yeah, it is a little bright. Stewie: You know Brian, I- I just noticed something. With that light shining on you from that angle, you look a lot like Jamie Farr. Brian: Yeah, youve told me that before and uh, its interesting, because Im thinking you look a lot like Britney Spears. Stewie: Really?! How so? Brian: Well, you- you got that thing going on with your eyes like Britney does. You know where You know how her eyes are just like a hair too far apart? Uh, a- a- almost like there was some immediate post-birth surgery that should have been done but it was the south, so they didnt have the medical technology. Stewie: Oh, I see. Chris: Mom! Lois: Yes honey? Chris: I have a wedgie. Lois: Chris, honey, wait until the intermission. Then you can fix it. Peter: Well, we got a lot of fun stuff lined up here tonight. We got music, we got comedy, we got behind the scenes crap from the show. Lois: Thats right! For example, not a lot of people know this, but in one episode of the show there was a flashback of Brian when he was a puppy. Now, they couldnt find a puppy who looked enough like him, so they actually built a dog suit for the scene, and the actor of inside the suit was Raven- Symoné, who was Olivia on the Cosby show. Brian: Fascinating bit of trivia. Peter: All right, okay, I got one for ya. You know the sound stage where we shoot Family Guy is the same stage where they shot the Golden Girls back in the 80s, right? Now one of the stage hands was telling me a- a pretty intense story. I guess there was one night when they were all ready to shoot, and uh, the audience was waiting. And uh, nobody could find Bea Arthur. So everybodys freaking out and uh, then one of the producers runs in and says Cancel the show tonight. Bea Arthurs in jail! Lois: Oh My God! Peter: Yeah. Apparently she had a little too much to drink before the show and uh, they found her standing on the street corner, exposing her penis to traffic. Brian: Oh My God! Meg: Ew! Thats Disgusting! Peter: Can you believe that? Brian: Wait a minute. How the hell can Bea Arthur have a penis? Peter: Eh, special permit. Stewie: I say, what is it with these actors? Theyre perfectly normal people in civilian life and then they come out to Hollywood and just go fucking berserk. Brian: You gotta watch your language, kid. Stewie: Oh, its a record album for Gods sake. Lets cut loose a bit. Chris: Nipples! Hehe. Stewie: Perfect example. Although I must say I am amazed at the language you can get away with on television these days. I- I was watching Law and Order the other night and I swear to god, I heard someone use the word balls. And I thought to myself, My God, that- that Dick Wolf just does whatever he damn well pleases, doesnt he? Bringing words like balls into Americas living rooms. I wonder how hed like it if I just walked into his living room a- and use the word balls. Brian: Uh I think that would be breaking and entering. Lois: You know, I am so glad they allowed us to bring Stewie this evening. The last show we did we had to leave him at home. They didnt allow babies in the theater. Brian: Well of course. People wanted to be able to enjoy the show Stewie: I am a show you lack-witted beetle head! Ugh! Oh what a night that was. My babysitter was a total bitch. Lois: Stewie! Thats very rude. Especially since your babysitter is here tonight. Ladies and gentlemen, Ms. Hailey Duff. Hailey Duff: Hi Mr. And Mrs. Griffin Peter: Howre ya, sweetheart? Lois: So was it really that bad babysitting Stewie? Hailey Duff: You want the truth? Well, okay. So after you and Peter left for dinner, I- No. Wait a minute. Lets tell this story right. Please.