You're the first car in an hour or so
I'm glad you stopped in
It's sure been slow around here today
Just like every day

Well, I couldn't help but notice your California plate
And I thought I recognized that name on your credit card
You're a movie star
Well, I can't wait to get back home, to tell all my buddies
That I met one of the most famous people in the country

Well, I only go to movies when I'm down in Bowling Green
The cable don't come out this far, so I never watch TV
I know you played in something, but I'm gonna need some help
Wait, weren't you in cannonball run?
No, ah well

Allow me to introduce myself, the name ain't John
This is somebody else's greasy shirt, my names Kurt
This is the town that I grew up in, never seen L.A.
The closest I been to Hollywood is Dollywood

But when you get back to Beverly Hills
You can tell all your buddies that you met
One of the most famous people in the country

'Cause I caught the record small mouth out on Kentucky lake
And I threw the winning touchdown pass
The night that we won state
I'm still signin' autographs after all these years
Oh yeah, I guess I'm gonna need your'un
Sign, um, here

I've been thinkin' 'bout doin' some actin' someday
If I ever do make it out to L.A.
Can I give you a shout, maybe crash on your couch
If you hear of any roles that are floatin' around
That put me and Ashley Judd makin' out
In a steamy love-scene, I'd work pretty cheap

If the phones are down, just ask around
You'll get a hold of me
'Cause I'm one of the most famous people
In the country

You're talkin' to one of the most famous people in the country
Six-pack, it was, wasn't it, you're in that movie's pack
You look a lot thinner and younger on TV
Are you gaining weight for a role or something?

And, I'm serious about that Ashley Judd thing
I would work for free
Have you ever met Dolly Parton?
Famous and famous people, ha, if you know what I mean