I live my life in these four walls Head full of dreams but I'm afraid to tell them all I climb the staircase Carry all the dead weight Just to fall, fall, fall, fall, fall There is a box I keep it closed All full of ashes from the letters that I wrote Maybe tomorrow The pills I couldn't swallow They'll seem small, small, small, small, small Ahh Sometimes I feel like A raindrop in the ocean Fell from the sky I Melted into nothing Don't know why (why) Last night I wrote my own eulogy Here lies the girl who never let herself be free Ain't it ironic The first time I was honest I was gone, gone, gone, gone, gone I'm not one to wear my heart out on my sleeve But here I am, will you take all of me? Thought love was for the perfect That I don't deserve it I was wrong, wrong, wrong, wrong, wrong Ahh

(When I- When I- When I-) (you did good, $lick) (When I die, fuck it, I wanna go to hell) (When I- When I- When I- When I-) (When I die, fuck it, I wanna go to hell) (When I- When I- When I- When I-) (When I die) 3 a.m., drinkin' with this pistol on my lap, uh Six medications, guess there ain't no fixin' that It's that broken motherfucker, knucklin' 'til I relapse If I die, they might cry 'til they inherit my stacks What a cold fuckin' world, tell me what's the word? Only time I speak my heart is when the message come out slurred, uh People-pleasing, always eager to fix a motherfucker's problems Leave me at the bottom, more comfortable with Gomorrah and Sodom I chew on fent' and rot my teeth All for moments of peace and slow heartbeats Got offered a God I dissed, who gon' save me? (Heh) All I could do is laugh and say "c'est la vie" (whoa, ye) Woe is me, I know you get the picture, uh This type of pain will earn you seven figures Check my DNA, my RNA come with predictors This shit is scripture and for what I got, there's no elixirs, uh Feel like I'm not enough, uh Find myself playing my dad like Honey Boy and Shia LaBeouf, uh My mama crying as she watch the clock Text my bro I love him, even though he got my number blocked I would give up everything to see my brothers clean No second thoughts, it's fuck the cost or take me, leave 'em be Take my money, say you love me, even if it's lies That connection's so depressing but it's all I got (when I die) When I die just play this fucking song I was never meant for this, been tortured just to carry on (when I die) Couple coupes, lotta zeroes and a couple homes None of it did shit for me, cock the pistol and now I'm- (when I die) Ayy, head in the clouds, it look like it might rain again Always holdin' back tears, it's how I manage to pay the rent Pay the bills, place the bet so I don't have to chase the check Verified through $uicide, the glitz and glamour came and went Wash my fucking soul and still that one stain is kept I just wanna be loved, the root of all my pain Except the type that comes with age In death, I can finally lay and rest I'm owed a little peace and I'm ready to erase the debt (I- I- I-) I never planned on showing the world the face that hides behind the mask I always thought the last thing I would hear would be the gun's blast Fill in the black hole in my chest with sex and drugs, but it never lasts, it never lasts Shit, two years ago Big Pharma should've just cashed me out Now I got a deviated septum, I'mma just rat me out Pat me down, ask me how I'm still depressed! All they see is my set, all they see is lack of debt All they see is what they wanna see Calling me a wannabe I don't wanna be in misery, exit the pharmacy Get a girl I wanna see, I wanna see how hard I bleed When she rips out my fucking heart, enter the pharmacy I'm a private person and take pride in my verses Fuck your whole opinion, I don't care if it worsens I'll ruin my reputation and make sure it's on purpose Fuck this shit! (When I die) When I die just play this fucking song I was never meant for this, been tortured just to carry on (when I die) Couple coupes, a lot of zeros and a couple homes None of it is shit for me, cock the pistol and now I'm- (When I die, fuck it, I wanna go to hell) (When I- When I- When I- When I-) (When I die, fuck it, I wanna go to hell) (When I- When I- When I- When I-) (When I die-)

Huh I love that, like I'm up feelin' right, the way niggas do this shit, man Shit is a honor It's a honor, really Yeah (Badmon) Uh Just lookin' at my generation Overdosed on blue pills, caught up in the Matrix Gotta spread love, though, 'cause it's a lotta hatred Know it's a marathon and these motherfuckers racist Everybody's dangerous, posin' with the stainless just to be famous It's like you gotta be brainless, for real 'Cause believin' in things that ain't even real They thought he was a gangsta, they thought he'd never tell Time will tell, it reveals, and it heals, so I chill Another day, another deal, made another mill But what do that mean when these kids still gettin' killed over no reason? R.I.P. my cousin Rell', yo, I'm still grievin' That's why I'm usually unavail But what I need to call for help for? Bitch, I put myself on Niggas behind bars vent to me on the cell phone Hate it when they gotta leave the message at the dial tone But they know I gotta do me if we gon' eat So I proceed to unleash the beast, and decease the beast Let me speak my peace, and if you reach, I teach I'm only here because I'm known in the streets I ain't proud about it, but I wouldn't ride without it, ayy Push me to my limit, bet you see I'm 'bout it, 'bout it Can these niggas fuck with me? I highly doubt it I'm mildly psychotic, hide the body in the trunk And still hit the hydraulics and prolly forget about it The flow's a sick dot, it see through the trick knowledge Never did college and I still raised dollars for tuition You could buy my album for like eight dollars Best money that you'll ever spend, I promise Best money that you'll ever spend, I promise Best money that you'll ever lend, I promise Best money that you'll ever, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah This for my niggas sittin' on the big wheels Mommies in the six-inch heels And to my haters who'll never know how this shit feels This shit get real, yeah, uh This for my niggas sittin' on the big wheels And my mommies in the six-inch heels And to my haters who'll never know how this shit feels This shit get real, uh, uh Ancient teachings on the wall Hop in the van, bust a cap and we off Welcome to the upper echelons, 'cause ya, um, um I'm feelin' synonymous to Nastradamus I'm movin' my new man, he ain't die anonymous Just tryna make a name for myself, they fraudulent Get blown out the water fuckin' with the conglomerates Swimmin' mainstream like a hungry hip-hoppotamus Yeah, you ain't great white guy, you just a great white lie With great ties to what seems to be a great white guy I got state wide eyes One stay on the rise while the other on the enterprise (yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah) This for my niggas sittin' on the big wheels And my mommies in the six-inch heels And to my haters who'll never know how this shit feels This shit get real, yeah This for my niggas sittin' on the big wheels And my mommies in the six-inch heels And to my haters who'll never know how this shit feels This shit get real, uh, uh Then they say we crazy and delirious Addicted to drugs, I'm just livin' it up I put a limit on none, pull my thoughts, let it run John and Emo ocean swimmin' the outcome They say problems is opportunities in disguise And each day I learn, I'm just tryna get it by Get high for that man and never mind Mind never matter, neither or ever did time Fuck clocks, let that shit unwind Fuck rocket ships, I blast off in my mind That don't cost a dime, I got unlimited rides Roller coaster coast between space and time Uh, what's the matter with this world that we livin' in? Full of fake snake dealin' niggas and the middleman Tryna plot against my dividends again They'll believe in anything when the pyramid, uh

Don't tell me you love me I would only cry I would only cry Big long rivers From my eyes From my eyes Don't play Death Cab for Cutie I fall back in time I fall back in time You took our love story Put it on the line Put it on the line Maybe I was under the impression I could always always ask you questions I can't help falling in love with you I can't help falling back in love Don't tell me you hurt me I would only cry I would only cry Big long rivers From my eyes From my eyes Don't play Death Cab for Cutie I fall back in time I fall back in time You took our love story Put it on the line Put it on the line Maybe I was under the impression I could always always ask you questions I can't help falling in love with you I can't help falling back in love

Sadness persists Because Anyone can send a Facebook justification A letter, a sympathetic reparation A bunch of words, a careful and thoughtful nuance To touch only from a distance For these words didn't have to be faxed from two miles away To someone who transatlanticised for you back in the day It's only fair to say Sadness persists Sadness persists Because Your liberation comes at a cost And that cost is the brewing and spewing of my mercy I was meant to believe Spasmodically That I was the one with the insanity While you baked yourself silly Morning to blackness Filled your bags with all your personal property Disdained me nonchalantly And all I spurred was "Stay" It's only fair to say Sadness persists In a second, you are not mine In a second, you are not mine Sadness persists Because Help, is not something that can be made to realise Because it's not ice cream Or a spoon of digene That can be digested automatically Help is what you give carefully Help is what you accept consciously Accepting the ghosts of your past Accepting that darkness needs its masks To be removed And had it been you And me alone It would have been another way It's only fair to say Sadness persists You left nothing behind and I was all alone You left nothing behind and I was all alone Sadness persists Because Man is not an animal Capable of receiving or of loving unconditionally Those in love will find themselves lucky And those who are alone will feel solitary Because this, is a cruel anomaly The existence of an ordered coherent Society, If it was for individuality I would have known a better way It's only fair to say Sadness persists

She laughs in the middle of the night With two boys who hold her tightly Her hair is blonde and she, oh she dresses in saris I saw her talking to the trees I saw her walking steadily Trenches that she had dug with her hands, oh they have come to life She says, she wants to live under the sun She says her boys were meant to run No schools for them The earth's enough She floats like a honey bee The boys swim in the mud and they've been Running around, scooting down and touching ground She's happy We meet in the mornings to say hullo She looks me in the eyes, extends her soul Took me so long to see she's inside of me She says, she wants to live under the sun She says her boys were meant to run No school for them The earth's enough

It's the freedom in your voice It's the child in your smiles Must be the floating of your thoughts Or the way you lift your brows Calling out to you like this, before I've never done this to anybody Tell me all that you wanted to be And secrets you've told nobody I'll be listening patiently Cause You make me feel like a wildflower You make me feel like a wildflower You make me believe I can be as wild as I can Let the nights turn into fire Let's run out into the wild Please make love to me under the clouds I love it when you kiss me under water Calling out to you like this, before I've never done this to anybody Tell me all that you wanted to be And secrets you've told nobody I'll be listening patiently Cause You make me feel like a wildflower You make me feel like a wildflower You make me believe I can be as wild as I can A flower that is free to sway like plants underwater A flower that bends alluringly towards the sun I am drowning in the depths of our conversations I am working in the nakedness of your existence We are free ecstatic young lovers I am falling in love

Today seems like it's not my day So I smile and I bow down to it Sometimes the sun, it burns my skin So I apply boroline to it The winter says it'll never be warm So I put on my best jacket My mother's love's like it'll never get old So I plunge into it Remember you were always wild Don't let them tame you through it Life gives lemons make lemonade So I find the biggest bucket Loneliness plays hide and seek So I bell her with a locket Children are playing on the street I join them in their cricket Friends say time togethers' time well spent So I move closer to them Money's becoming a burden now So I lighten my pockets All the greens - they are chopping it down So we go grow a forest Smoke from the cars is killing my cat So I built her a garden I built her a beautiful garden I built her a beautiful garden