All right, gentlemen, let's get on with it
Which of us will write our Declaration of Independence?

Mr. Adams, I say you should write it
To your legal mind and brilliance we defer

Is that so?
Well, if I'm the one to do it
They'll run their quill pens through it
I'm obnoxious and disliked, you know that, sir

Yes, I know

But I say you should write it, Franklin
Yes, you

Hell, no

Yes, you, Dr. Franklin
You (But -)
You (But -)
You (But -)

Mr. Adams, but Mr. Adams
The things I write are only light extemporania
I won't put politics on paper, it's a mania
So I refuse to use the pen in Pennsylvania

Pennsylvania, Pennsylvania
Refuse to use the pen

Mr. Sherman, I say you should write it
You are never controversial, as it were

That is true

Whereas if I'm the one to do it
They'll run their quill pens through it
I'm obnoxious and disliked
You know that, sir

Yes, I do

Then I say you should write it, Roger
Yes, you

Good heavens, no!

Yes you, Roger Sherman
You (But-)
You (But-)
You (But-)

Mr. Adams, but Mr. Adams
I cannot write with any style or proper etiquette
I don't know a participle from a predicate
I am just a simple cobbler from Connecticut

Connecticut, Connecticut
A simple cobbler, he

Mr. Livingston, maybe you should write it
You have many friends and you're a diplomat

Oh, that word

Whereas if I'm the one to do it
They'll run their quill pens through it

He's obnoxious and disliked
Did you know that?

I hadn't heard

So I say you should write it, Robert
Yes, you

Not me, Johnny

Yes, you, Robert Livingston
You (But-)
You (But-)
You (But)

Mr. Adams, dear Mr. Adams
I've been presented with a new son by the noble stork
So I am going home to celebrate and pop the cork
With all the Livingstons together back in old New York

New York, New York
Livingston's going to pop a cork

Well, Mr. Jefferson?

Mr. Adams, leave me alone!

Mr. Jefferson!

Mr. Adams, I have not seen my wife for
The past six months. I beg of you, Mr. Adams-

"And we solemnly declare that we will preserve our liberties being
With one mind resolve to die free men rather than to live slaves
Thomas Jefferson, on the Necessity of Taking Up Arms, 1775
Magnificent

You write ten times better than any man in Congress
Including me
For a man of only thirty-three years
You have a happy talent of composition
And a remarkable felicity of expression
Now, then, Sir
Will you be a patriot or a lover?

A lover

No!

But, I burn, Mr. A!

So do I, Mr. J!

You?

You do?

John!

Who'd have thought it?

Mr. Jefferson
Dear Mr. Jefferson
I'm only forty-one
I still have my virility
And I can romp through Cupid's grove with great agility
But life is more than sexual combustibility

Bustibility!
Bustibility!
Combustabil-

Quiet!

Mr. Adams
Damn you, Mr. Adams
You're obnoxious and disliked
That cannot be denied
Once again you stand between me
And my lovely bride

Lovely bride!

Oh, Mr. Adams
You are driving me
To homicide!

Homicide!
Homicide!
We may see murder yet!